Pan to the side of the tank where men were sorting fish, netting them from the tank and the fish were flying. So was water as the big brutes were grabbed and hoisted over the side and dumped in the anesthetic bath. Still the splashing continued as more fish were added to the bath. Soon most was quiet and a man with forearms as big as a 3SW Mowi grapples with a female fish and lifts her out by the tail. The fish flips a bit, but is no match for the master. He makes her assume the position and cops a feel so she squirts out a few eggs. The camera zooms in to film the orange pearls that are expressed.

Swift dispatch

As the camera zooms out, our man reaches for the love stick and quickly, swiftly dispatches the fish with a deft blow to the head. He gives one more for insurance. The fish does the wiggle dance and goes slack. Our man makes two quick cuts on the tail, laces on a cord and hangs her on the rack. Another worker cuts the gill arch and drains the blood from the carcass. Our big man goes back and grabs another fish.

The females are hosed down and the blood washed away, the mess cleaned up. One by one, big burly people present the fish to hatchery staff. The fish is dried off with a towel, inverted and slit stern to stem with a blade. Out pours the gold into the receiving pan and the camera zooms in again on the haploid generation.

Telltale squirt

Meanwhile, Mr. Forearms is doing the identical thing to males: he’s checking for the telltale squirt, looking for a rich texture and plenty of volume. When he finds it, the love stick comes out again and Papa is hung next to Mama. While the females are spawned, a crew is expressing milt from the ripe males. Of course, the camera zooms in on this. Each fish is labeled and the milt/eggs containers marked with the donor’s number.

The health tech is shown on film to cut open the fish, conduct a gross necropsy and take tissue samples. Bit of fish are tucked into vials. Although there is plenty of blood, the tech never gets any on the paper work. Truly a gift.

Sex in a bucket

The next shot is sex in a bucket. Milt is measured and poured on, mixed in and the water added to activate the sperm. Froth is happening and everyone is satisfied. The eggs are rinsed and put to bed.

The whole tape lasts about 4 minutes. This all seems natural, straightforward and commonplace. Nothing new here.

Unless the tape is shown at dinner. Which it was.

Mr. and Mrs. J.Q. McPublic were not able to finish their boiled beef and tatties. The networks were flooded with irate viewers who deferred all calls to government agencies. Why not? They are the ones that permit and condone these barbaric practices. The tabloids and the Greenies ate it up.

Despite having SOPs for spawning and an approved method for euthanizing fish, the hatchery management was keel-hauled. Logic was not going to be a factor in this argument.

A better way

Ever sensitive to the qualms of a feeling public and with duty towards fish, people and the industry, one company took on the challenge. This company sat down and figured out a way to euthanize fish that was cost effective, achieved high fertility rates, was humane and kept the public at bay. And it is fast.

Females are sorted for ripeness on the first day by drawing down the tank, getting in with the fish and sorting them over a low fence. The fence and the water are raised and fish are given a full day to recover from the sorting. The next morning, the tank is drawn down and the fish crowded by a moving fence. The fish are netted quickly and placed in a bath of lethal anesthetic. In a minute or so, the fish are out forever.

The fish are dipped in a clean bath, dried and airspawned. So simple and so quick. Of course, the vet literally has a bloodbath when sampling tissues, but someone has to do it. A crew of 5 can do hundreds of fish in a morning. Granted, a little equipment is involved, but the practice satisfies all the objectives.